This post is about IHOP

I'm sorry I just can't use the word "blog" anymore when I know it is wrong. I know I already addressed that. My pride wanted me to let everyone know that I knew it was wrong, so no one would think I was dumb. But now I have reached the point where I am humble enough to repent and change my egregious action. Aka, this is a big day for me, hahaha.

Ok, back to the topic at hand. Last night I went to IHOP. I was pretty excited. It's a good place. Open 24 hours. Not toooo shady. Better than Waffle House because IHOP has waffles, but Waffle House does NOT have pancakes. I used to think that meant that Waffle House sucked. But now after some inward reflection I'm thinking, maybe Waffle House is just true to who he really is, and IHOP is a pansy that succombs to peer pressure and tries to please everyone. Maybe if IHOP wasn't so busy with their international crepes and their balsamic chicken (an actual menu item, although the waitress was convinced it was pronounced "baslamic"), they would spend more time on their pancakes, which are terrible. Seriously, the worst kind of pancakes: the fat ones that soak up all the syrup and turn to mush till it's no longer a pancake, but a mealy syrup cake.

But the worst part about my IHOP experience happened after I left the restaurant. Ok, you know how when you leave certain restaurants, you come out smelling like that food? Well, I kid you not, my sweatshirt literally reeked of grease. Not like bacon or sausage or something semi-pleasant that I could live with. No, just pure grease. It seriously smells like someone deep-fried my sweatshirt. Sigh. I smelled it again this morning, and I fear it is permanent. I am so disgusted that there is no way I am eating the leftover half of my Big Steak Omelette that I brought home.

And you know it's bad when I'm not eating my leftover steak.